The Truth and Fake Friends

I keep telling both myself and everyone else,who bothers to listen that I want the truth and nothing but the truth. I mean, if someone can't stand me then I would like to know why and maybe I could change or we could just stop pretending to like each other and quit hanging out. I'm tired of fake friends, tired of being used and back stabbed again and again. Tired of having people around me who I know doesn't like me or have talked crap behind my back.

But when you finally get hold of the truth, what do you do with it? Do you face the people who a while back made you seem like a dork? Do you just keep it inside of you, lock it in a chest deep inside your heart and avvoid your so-called-friends? OR do you ignore it, pretend like nothing happened that day and that nobody told you? Honestly I don't know anymore. Because when somebody tells you about back stabbing friends who talked crap about you and your secrets for over six months ago does it really matter? Isn't it a little too late to act, to defend yourself? And defending yourself from the other side of the world is not that easy either now, is it?

You might wonder when I stopped being a fake friend, a back stabber, and yeah, I admit it. I was one of "them". But the difference is, I changed. They didn't.

A while back my mom told me that people change when they grow up, that they realize how stupid it is to talk behind others back. I needed to hear that, but now I am not so shure it is true. At least not about everyone. Maybe most people, but not all. But then again not everybody grows up.

Peace Ida.